“Frustration”
I will always say this project gave me
bittersweet moments of feeling proud and kind of sad. For my photo series, I
got inspired by Cindy Sherman's artwork “Nobody is here but me” and Frida Kahlo.
After I graduated from my ballet academy, life started to get a little bit busier.
College was hard on me plus a full-time job and let's add to that the responsibilities
at home. I’ve been off stage for about two years now, and even though every day
I play some music and my body just wants to dance, it’s just not the same. So,
this is my current “frustration”; wanting to be on daily rehearsals, competitions,
and on stage every day and not be able to because of how busy my schedule is,
it’s just a disaster.
I
decided to take out one of my ballerina costumes and recreate a scenario where I
do the tasks of my daily life, but there is a ballerina living in me. The first
2 images in the photo series are a representation of how college has me lately,
with hours in front of my computer and a lot of assignments. The second picture
is a representation of the weekly household chores I oversee doing and that also
keeps me busy. However, I always end up dancing in between cleaning because
there’s a ballerina in me. For the two last pictures, I decided to recreate “server
Rachel”. I’m extremely happy about the opportunities that have come my way at
my current job because I know I’ll be able to keep growing, but at the same
time, if I didn’t have to work, I’d be able to continue with my dance journey. However,
I’ll always be proud that a ballerina lives in me. And it doesn’t matter the
place I will be or the role I will be executing now, I am aware of my identity professional-wise.
Rachel Alfonso could be serving,
cleaning, or trying to finish this bachelor but she also graduated from ballet,
and even though she gets frustrated because all these characters are putting
some limit on her passion; she is proud of herself.
“I’m
frustrated at trying to capture on film something that I can’t even articulate
because I don’t know what it is I am looking for until I see it” (Cindy
Sherman). Just like Cindy I still don’t know what I’m looking for in life, and
I guess I'll realize once in front of me. All I know is that I want to do so
much stuff at the same time, then maybe that’s why I get so frustrated and don’t
take my time to canalize what it is that I want. “People have described her as broken and fragile, but she was
strong and accomplished a tremendous amount in her lifetime.” Frida
possessed an inner strength that helped her face challenges, adversity, or
personal struggles with resilience and determination. It implies that her
character and resolve were far from weak. Not only was she strong in
character, but she also achieved significant and noteworthy accomplishments
during her life. These accomplishments could be in various domains, such as
career, personal growth, community service, or any other area where she made a
positive impact. But Frida also reached a level of frustration at some point in
her life because of her disability, but something I admire is that even though
she got unfortunate in that sense, she never stopped creating, expressing, and
sharing her art, because she found herself again. Indeed, I wish to find myself
again through the artist I am and continue to share my joy on stage, so I can
end this frustration…
References
Cindy Sherman (Cindy Sherman - Nobody's Here But Me (1994) - YouTube)
Frida Kahlo ((816) What this painting tells us about Frida Kahlo - YouTube)
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